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I've got TMF on, but with the sound down. This OVER-BLONDE pointy-faced wish-I-was-a-ROCK-CHICK woman comes on, in mutton-dressed-as-lamb leather, whose every desperate motion seems to SCREAM: I so wish I was Madonna. Worse, the rest of the running jumping twisting flexing stroboscopic video is filled with that quickly-tiresome thing that was briefly trendy about 18 months ago - you know, where straight but somehow Muscle Mary looking boys do balletic leaps off the concrete lips of 1970s car parks and do synchorised touchy-tippy-toe jumps off urban mugging walkways. This is so bad - so DESPERATE - I actually start to giggle a bit, in embarrassed sympathy, waiting to see who this dreadful old trout is who looks like a Channel 5 Makeover Programme entry who started out as a Tottenham crack hoover and had bad plastic surgery to look like a Madonna aping drag queen circa Blonde Ambition.

And but - o-mi-gawd (and I suspect you've already seen this payoff coming, no?) it is MOTHER MADONNA, and her new single PUSH.


Halfway through a dreary TMF "BAD GIRLS Top 20" up shoots the video for HOLE's wonderful wonderful wonderful "CELEBRITY SKIN", and for a few fizz-pop melancholy minutes you are reminded of the brief moment when COURTNEY LOVE could have been, no kidding, one of the greatest and most intersting POP STARS ever ever ever; instead of the broken-down dignity-free BO SELECTA self-parody she has turned herself into.

posted by Ian 10/14/2006 02:30:00 PM

The same "urban jumping" moves were "busted" on the Confessions tour - not during "Push", but during (naturally!) "Jump". I thought of the French & Saunders sketch and got the giggles.
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